LIfe surfing

Life has been funny lately. Perhaps the little hiatus that Saturday Night took during the months of July and August helped. It was a dark summer to begin with. Aside from the visit from the Barths and the birth of Adelyn, there was little that went well from my perspective.
Many compare life to a journey through valleys and up and over mountains. It would seem that as of late, life is more like riding a surf board in the tidal zone. Life as journey implies a sense that we govern our path and circumstances. Life on the water implies a position of response and reaction to life moving past.
There is that quote i like, "How we live is what we believe, everything else is just words."
Tonight i read Jesus response to that statement. "Do not merely listen to the word, and so decieve yourself. Do what it says."
The changes that have come since August in both the Saturday Night Group and the Sunday Fellowship have been more than exciting. At least from my perspective.
As an exciting start in a new direction, a "young lady" has come back into our circle who was widowed a couple of years ago. To boot, she has suffered from cancer and ongoing chemo treatments and complications from that. She is lonely and reaches out. She is a bit overwhelming. She is one of God's creation.
Starting this week we will be going to her. She is now home bound and doesn't have many visitors. Thank God that sometimes he throws opportunities in front of us so clearly that we couldn't miss it if we wanted to.
Thank the Creator that we have opportunity to love. i seek, we seek, a greater, deeper community. Something intentional and tightly woven together. How can we achieve that until we can master the smaller, simpler facates of love.
Practice makes perfect.

The beginning of the last chapter of the end of the story. . .

i drove to work tonight. i like to drive. There is something that happens when i drive, especially alone. It's like life slows down to a near stand still as creation races by as though in a hurry to meet oblivion.
There is a stretch of wetland between my house and work. A wonderfully misunderstood world of quazi-stagnant water and ferns. Oaks, and maples, birch and frogs and mushrooms. It's been officially autumn now for four days, and the leaves have been evolving to an artist's stroke for some time. But it wasn't until tonight that i actually noticed the autumn creeping in and subduing this particular wetland area. It was calming, almost too calming.
About 13 seconds is all that it takes to traverse the whole of the swamp by vehicle over route 25, but it seemed that much longer. Like the truck moved through at the speed of life, but i was dragged behind in time. i noticed the color of each individual leaf, and the trees preparing to fein death for a peaceful winters rest. i noticed the bark on each tree, and the wind as it grabbed each tree by the base of the trunk and shook them vigorously.
It was like the Nexus. . . i wanted more. i want more of that.

The beginning of the last chapter of the end of the story. . .

i drove to work tonight. i like to drive. There is something that happens when i drive, especially alone. It's like life slows down to a near stand still as creation races by as though in a hurry to meet oblivion.
There is a stretch of wetland between my house and work. A wonderfully misunderstood world of quazi-stagnant water and ferns. Oaks, and maples, birch and frogs and mushrooms. It's been officially autumn now for four days, and the leaves have been evolving to an artist's stroke for some time. But it wasn't until tonight that i actually noticed the autumn creeping in and subduing this particular wetland area. It was calming, almost too calming.
About 13 seconds is all that it takes to traverse the whole of the swamp by vehicle over route 25, but it seemed that much longer. Like the truck moved through at the speed of life, but i was dragged behind in time. i noticed the color of each individual leaf, and the trees preparing to fein death for a peaceful winters rest. i noticed the bark on each tree, and the wind as it grabbed each tree by the base of the trunk and shook them vigorously.
It was like the Nexus. . . i wanted more. i want more of that.

The beginning of the last chapter of the end of the story. . .

i drove to work tonight. i like to drive. There is something that happens when i drive, especially alone. It's like life slows down to a near stand still as creation races by as though in a hurry to meet oblivion.
There is a stretch of wetland between my house and work. A wonderfully misunderstood world of quazi-stagnant water and ferns. Oaks, and maples, birch and frogs and mushrooms. It's been officially autumn now for four days, and the leaves have been evolving to an artist's stroke for some time. But it wasn't until tonight that i actually noticed the autumn creeping in and subduing this particular wetland area. It was calming, almost too calming.
About 13 seconds is all that it takes to traverse the whole of the swamp by vehicle over route 25, but it seemed that much longer. Like the truck moved through at the speed of life, but i was dragged behind in time. i noticed the color of each individual leaf, and the trees preparing to fein death for a peaceful winters rest. i noticed the bark on each tree, and the wind as it grabbed each tree by the base of the trunk and shook them vigorously.
It was like the Nexus. . . i wanted more. i want more of that.

Declaration of obedience. . .Would some call this a statement of faith?

A good friend asked about my thoughts on the "Sermon on the Mount". It is questions like these that i cherish. It is questions like these that have been coming up repeatedly lately, as though to say, "Hey! Wake up. Do you know what you believe? Do you believe in the living Creator or the system that has been built up around him?"

"How we live is what we believe. Everything else is just words."
"I have only recently become a follower of Christ, as opposed to just a believer in Christ. . ."

These two quotes just keep circle my brain. i have skimmed through those passages in Matthew again, and am forced to admit that there is a great deal that i am not sure about. Of all of these things there are a few things that i am certain about:

1) There is only one church.
2) No prayer brings salvation without a life of obedience.
3) No life of obedience is possible without a growing understanding of Love.
4) A life of obedience brings with it the obligation of submission to brothers and sisters.
5) Motives are as important, and sometimes more important that actions. They are a result of the true condition of the heart.
6) A life of obedience requires the continued willingness to surrender everything, and contentment with nothing.

These are just thoughts, works in progress. There is a lot to learn, to know. . . i grasp so very little of it.

Thanks Phil!

Sometimes there just isn't much to say. . .

Sometimes it's nice to have nothing so say. At least nothing that could be construed or misconstrued as quasi-philosophical, preachy or maybe even deep.
Today has just been, "blah". i am sitting in a desk that i don't much care for in a job that i have come to loath. Working a job that is more a farce than anything else. . .
i would be a liar if i didn't say that this isn't my fault. This past two months has been full of corrections, self revelations, and really obvious answers to questions that i have. Somewhere down deep i know that there are paths out of things that i allow to hold me down, but for whatever reason, i seem to be happier being held down. . . or afraid to take the steps necessary to move forward. i wonder if my father ever felt this way.
i have a wife and family, a house, bills. . .maybe even an aspiration or two. my own aspirations and belongings (including to house) i could give up. The family is a whole different story. i can't just ask them to pick up and move on a whim. It wouldn't be just once, and it wouldn't be to some happy place. Were we to move, it would be some place in trouble, some place where danger lived, and not holed up in a cave, but walked the streets among the general populous.

Of all of the thoughts that have crossed the threshold of my mind recently is the simple command, get rid of all anger, bitterness, hatred, etc. . .written to the church in Ephesus.

Priorities. . .

Saturday Nights have continued to evolve as is inevitable. We had a great honeymoon period full of excitement laced with moments of really sincere communion with each other and God. Toward the end of the honeymoon period we became comfortable. We talked about where it is we might be going. We continued to explore harder topics. We realized that this was work, that even in a struggle to be different and deeper we looked the same as much of the rest of the "church". Some struggled to move forward in depth, others wanted to stick with the patterns that we have grown up with. Many ran forward with the armour of God and the artillery of self.
We struggled, and struggle still. We try to put our definition and expectations onto the fellowship, some struggle to break the chains of the establishment, some continue to divide the church into function specific gatherings.

In the end, the church is the church, and there is only one. We are the culmination of all of our talents and gifts, craddled in the bassinet of God's will. Being the church is really a very delicate balance. Like the food web, the loss of one link can cause the web to collapse.
We have to find our balance. Too much of anyone thing can cause the corruption of the whole. The church in the hands of man leads to religion. Too much program, too much self, too much organization, too little organization, too little honesty. . . any of this and more can drive us into danger.

NOTHING should be done out of selfishness. At the root of all sin is the promotion of self or the seeking of self interest. It's subtle, and hard to see at times, but it's everywhere. Yes, everywhere. It's in the "church". How often has the phrase, "i didn't feel fed" slip from someones lips after a Sunday morning meeting?
Do we go to "church" to be fed? No! This is selfishness.
First we don't go to "church", we are the Church. Secondly when the Church meets, we should not meet with the intention of being fed, we should meet with the intention of feeding others. When we meet, and we are all concerned about feeding one another, we will not need to worry about being fed because everyone else will be working to feed us.
Further i would postulate that when we walk away unfed, it is not the result of others failure to create a lesson that connects with us, but rather it is our failure to seek God.

James wrote in a letter, "You want something but don't get it. You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want. You quarrel and fight. You do not have, because you do not ask God. When you ask, you do not recieve, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on you pleasures."

Motives. . . how often does it come back to motives. Who do we serve? Which is the greatest command?
"Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself."

"The greatest among you will be your servant."

"You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather serve one another in love."

I hold that absolutely nothing should be done with ourselves in mind. NOTHING. Instead, we should approach everything from a slaves perspective.
It would behove us to learn to unity. Seek the Church, and not my "church". Whether we meet in the same fellowships or different ones we are part of the Church. We should seek to support one another, encourage one another, serve one another, love one another.
Avoid putting expectations on each other. Rather than expect under some sort of judgement (no matter how small or severe), be full of joy when we meet. Work together as much as we can, and when we can't encourage to the fullest of our capability (in reality and not just in word).

When the bride says, "Come!" Let it be with the right motives, and not out of a desire to escape our particular circumstances, or to call judgement on anyone. Together in obedience we will do powerful things and when we cry together, "Come Lord!" He will see that our hearts are one, and our motives are pure . . .

The gypsy revival. . .

There was time when living in one place seemed foolish. Now i suffer from the disease called Americana. The false philosophy that i deserve whatever i want, and that i should pursue all that i want. i guess if my desires are well directed then yes, i should pursue all that i want (but this is not justifying the pursuit of crap a.k.a. all the stuff i think i need). As for deserving all that i want. . . Why? Why am i deserving just because i was born in this country if others are not deserving just because they were born in poverty or under oppression? We were born under the same circumstances. We are born, and bleed and hurt and love and heal, and die. So why am i deserving?i have a great wife, wonderful kids, a house, a yard, two cars. . .
There was a day that this would have made me vomit. Maybe it should again. Of course we are all called to different lives, and we are given the wonderful blessing of choice. To some degree we get to choose how to live. How much are we willing to give back?
i have been inundated recently with hurricane Katrina "one year later". It's everywhere. People looking back. Some for healing, some to remember better times. Some seeking inspiration. And i think of the gypsies.
For those like me who dream of being in the middle of hell on earth to help people who were born "less deserving", the gypsy life style is perfect. Home on the road. Having the freedom to live wherever, whenever it is necessary. Have odd jobs to build a bit of capital, and then move to where there is need, to provide assistance without being a burden. Work while you are needed. Move and get some odd jobs, build up some capital and move on to share your blessing with others in need.
i hope if anyone breaks free from the disease of Americana and discovers the beauty and wealth of blessing of the pseudo-gypsy revolution that they write and share the blessing and inspiration.

A month of gains and losses

"It was the best of times, it was the worst of times."
That is how Jeff once began his end of the year thoughts after the closing campfire during a time of reflection.
i am sure that somewhere in history someone stole Jeff's opening thoughts, but we will forgive a work of lesser importants. Now that Jeff is gone, moved on to better home, those words almost sting. Funny, of all the conversations we had, those ring out again to me as though they were his own words and not a play on someone elses.
July was the beginning of a hard summer (well, not the beginning of summer but the beginning of change). i may remember it as the darkest summer of my life to date, but so much revelation and conviction came out of it, not to mention the birth of my daughter, that it wasn't really all bad.
Jeff's transition marked the end of an amazing era. An era with such impact that the funeral had to be arrainged over at least three continents. i mourn our loss, but celebrate our gain from both his life and untimely passing.
My daughter was born four weeks early, and just five days before i was to make a pilgrimage back home to celebrate Jeff's life with a myriad of friends. Then came the worst of times. Adelyn was having health "issues". i use the word issues because they weren't problems perse (they are normal issues for premature kids), but they were enough that she wasn't going to be released from the hospital.
This created conflict because i would have to choose between staying in town, and going home. On the surface the solutions seems an easy one, but there were, and are many underlying plot twists that made it not an easy decision to make.
The readers digest version (or the morale of the story):
i stayed. i am not at peace about quite a bit of this decision, but it was the one that needed to be made. First, because my wife asked me to stay, and i needed to serve her. Second, because my elders thought it wise. There is such a straying from what we see in the early church about obedience to the body and to Christ over our will, that this became a very pivotal reason for my staying. Thirdly, i was in conflict. With no peace about either option sometimes the best thing is to stay where you are. And so it was.
Someone on Myspace had written, "What you live is what you really believe. Everything else is idle chatter."
Powerful, convicting, true. i am a firm believer in the continuity of life beyond what is here and now but i apparently don't live (or haven't lived) as though i really believe it. i know that Jeff lives on, yet i still mourn him and place undo amounts of importance on rituals that focus on death. i mourn totally unnecessarily. i say this because why mourn for one who isn't dead?
If i am mourning for myself, that is selfish, and where is the merit in it?
Certainly this will be a summer to remember, to learn from. The passing of Bob Avila, the passing of Doane, the passing of Steve Irwin (yea, i confess i am a huge fan - but not obsessive), the meeting of Georg and Maida, the birth of Adelyn, the list goes on. . .

On so many levels the time has come to live what believe, and believe what we live.

Organized chaos and the timing of timing. . .

One of the hardest things to do, or rather not to do, is jump ahead of the ball. It is immeasurably difficult to not plan ahead, or try to move forward before the timing is right. The desire to find a big farm, or acquire a big space to live in the city is great, but we are not there yet. There are only two of us right now. There are several people who flutter around the idea, like moths around a light after dark, but no one that i know of is ready to make the jump to communal living.
So who knows what the future will bring. All that i know for now is that i have to be patient. . . but it is so darned hard. . .

Simply live

Georg and Maida have left the building. . . actually the state. In someways there visit accounts for my lack of thoughts lately. Life was action packed and vibrant with them here at home.
Alas, the community had other tasks for them and they are home now.
In their wake is left a great number of thoughts and a call to be obedient. Above all things i know that as we strip away all of the religiousity out of life, that we need to simply live.
God comes and touches us in our daily lives. In our comings and goings, in our breathing, our crying, and our smiles. The creator did not make us to seek buildings, or books, though books can help.
i wonder as i struggle to be open to God moving, if the hardest part of seeking is God is sometimes that we seek God. We search, as men seek treasure chests, or children hunt for easter eggs, and often the tunnel vision sets in.
Think of the last time you sat in a park or nature and stared at the skies, and wondered about the clouds, or the stars, or how the branches of trees hang high over head. There is God. We are left breathless, and in wonderment - the same way a child is enamoured by swarms of bubbles, or lightening bugs over a field at night. There God is.

Simplifying the kingdom of Heaven

God is not looking for heroic figures - wonderful people - who captivate others with their charisma. It must have been quite baffling to the educated world when Jesus pronounced, "Blessed are the poor in spirit" - blessed are the uneducated, those who do not try to understand everything with their intellect! Blessed are they who do not have to impress others by showing how smart they are. Blessed are they who are not always theorizing about spiritual things. What Jesus is saying is that it is the day laborers who are blessed, those who live from hand to mouth and yet are skilled with their hoe or pickax. Blessed are the Farm workers with their plow, who can't think much about anything except how best to do their work. Blessed are the craftsmen who create their handicraft and work hard to finish it on time but do not have time to read many books. Blessed are all such people whom we label uneducated - for these people are taught by God.
The kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these, those who are poor in spirit - for it is these who understand God, for they live according to their hearts. The others live according to their heads and thus cannot be used. They are too concerned about what might happen and don't leave the Father freedom to act.

- Christoph Blumhardt

The power of nothing. . .

Ok, so not so much nothing as little. Being still, passive, quiet. i think of power, and instinctively i think of bombs, of raging fires, of steroid enhanced super body builders. Try and imagine life with absolutely no motion whatsoever, not even on a molecular scale. It's like imagining absolute nothingness. . . It can't be done.
It takes some effort to think about rain drops, a gentle breeze, and stopped movement. i suppose that there are two expressions of power. One is the kind of power that comes forcefully and can not be stopped. It is the force that changes landscapes, fells giant trees, or drops gigantic buildings.
The second is the kind of power that stops movement. It travels inwardly exploring the truest caverns of peace. It takes motion and pressure and paralyzes them both in a passive manner. This power is the power that allows us to have the clearest and most lucid of thoughts, and bring us to the truest place of peace and balance.

Same Bat times, different bat channel

Tonight was pleasant, in spite of the fact that i am five hundred plus miles away from Amy and the kids.
i am in Sackett's Harbor, New York. George and Maida have been with us for just over a couple of days. Tonight was the first clear night that we have seen in several weeks, so George and i decided to walk from my mother in law's house (we are helping her move back to Maine), to Lake Ontario. What a night! It was so much like the many walks that my brother and i would take in down town Santa Cruz, all those years ago. But that was when we were neither married. i thought those days would never end. Then they did. Then i thought i would never get those days back.
i know that these days, like those, are fleeting. George and Maida and Daniel will have to return home eventually. But it has been such a nice reminder that sometimes old things are not lost, they are just made new!!!

-isms

The view from the fence is nice. Not a popular place to ride from anymore it seems, especially if you go bareback, but all of the discomfort and splinters are offset by the amazing view. i have had a week of wonderful conversations this week ranging from matters of religious expression, to local and state politics (The state primaries and local elections are coming up in a few days). What a society and probably a world of black and white we have become. It seems that everything is all evil or all good. Whether it's candidates, religious expression or varieties of wine. Its numbing that we take all or nothing. People are judged by their affiliations rather than for their hearts, and character, and groups are judged wholly on their public face rather than by the members that make them up (ok, so the last statement doesn't seem to make sense from the get go, but there is quite a bit of logic behind it). Hang on while i go and get the tweezers, got another splinter. Nobody is either all good, or all bad! Yes that's right, neither Bush, nor Hussein, nor Hitler. Not even Osama! Yes they suffer from an excess of bad judgment, but they can not be all bad. Likewise for the staunch democrat. . . Bush isn't all bad. Or for the fundamentalist Christian. . . Buddhism isn't all bad. If it were it couldn't share many of the same teachings of Jesus, or one would have to argue that Jesus couldn't be all good. So what's my point?The world isn't black and white. Any line of thinking or organization, the "-isms" as i like to call them (racism, feminism, sexism, etc), that focuses solely for the advancement of their people above all else are wrong! Not totally wrong, because everyone should have their causes supported, but they should not be advanced to the loss of others. There must be balance. All people treated equally. If we spent more time seeking the good in people, and building them up, and less time seeking out the negative (which is usually much more blatantly obvious) and making it our purpose to *fix* everyone else, maybe we wouldn't fight so much. The view from the fence here is good, though i do have some recommendations.
1) Avoid the white picket variety, they tend to smart a little.
2) Find one with a wide gate.
3) Probably not a bad idea to invest in a saddle. . .Otherwise at least a pair of tweezers.

g'mornin' all!

The havoc of peace in chaos

Oh the joy of a bad memory. It humors me anyway! i can't tell you the number of days i have double booked or sometimes triple booked. Every now and again i am able to find a way to work things out, but there are other times when i find myself in a pickle. For whatever reason i find myself in that position again. This of course is partly my fault, but more for reasons of bad communication than actually double booking myself. This is just a crazy time of year. This weekend one great friend graduates, we have a yard sale to help support another friend, i have to work Friday and Saturday night, we have a gathering of the church on Saturday and Sunday, i am supposed to pick up the new chicken coop Saturday, and my mother in law is trying to move from New York to Maine, and i am supposed to help with that. All of the strain has taken my 8 month pregnant wife right to the brink of insanity, as has it my mother in law. They had what i call a "festive interlude" last night. Then of course my wife called me in a failed attempt to debrief and to let me know that a couple was coming to stay with us for a month or so. Originally they were slated to show up in July, but they called to say they would be here Saturday. . . . It was a strange feeling as i listened to my wife (i could feel her angst rising along with her blood pressure), you could here the concern and stress in her voice, but for whatever reason the more i thought about how insurmountable this weekend seemed, i know/knew that it is all going to be alright. Sometimes in the midst of chaos God adds one more bit of havoc that helps to bring peace. He will not gives more than we can handle!!! Thank God for that.

Expressions, intentions, and willingness. . .

i am a transplant to New England.
Last night a friend of mine who grew up here was talking to a friend of hers who is also a transplant to the area. During the course of conversation her friend noted how spiritually cold New England seems. My friend asked me if i thought is was true. My answer of course is yes.

i have traveled quite extensively and i have been to no place like New England (well Maine specifically). i don't find it dark, or even a turn off. There are some truly wonderful people and fellowships here, but the aura is very, very subdued - even traditional.

She asked how to change this, and was a bit shocked by her obliviousness to this atmosphere. i think that the answer is fairly simple. In light of all that Amy and i have experienced in the last year, it becomes more and more evident that we need to abandon some of the "old ways" of church. People do not believe because they have not seen. Even the most devout follower of Jesus believes part on faith and part on tangibility. i have seen, therefore i can believe.
The problem lies therein. Few in New England have seen the love of God or the Kingdom lived out.
Monkey see, monkey do. We must live out this love so that others may see it. i do not believe that we can accomplish this living in the fragmented communities that we do. However i would not suggest that we run away and live outside of the world. We need to remain in the world, but in solidarity. Communities supporting communities. We need to be the church instead of churches. We are too spread out, to consumed by our need to possess, and be Americans. Ruled by our schedules rather than ruling them.
Intentions are good, but the kingdom of Heaven is not a matter of talk but of power. We need to become kingdom minded, looking forward to the future and what is to come, and live like we are looking forward to that. We need to put ourselves into a lifestyle that allows us to express our love as Jesus does. We need to be willing to give up everything, right down to our interests, possessions and even our calling.
There are three from the old covenant that we can learn from. Enoch. . .who was called a friend of God, but unfortunately little is recorded about.
Abraham, who gave up his future and was willing to give up his "calling" by sacrificing his son. He was asked to be willing to give it up, but was not ask to actually give it up. And he was willing. He was credited with righteousness for believing God.
David, who although was given a promise about the future, did not seize any opportunity to further that promise. He waited patiently on God to fulfill his purpose. He was one after God's own heart.
We should simplify.

Just some rambelings from the journal

A friend of mine died, and i didn't really know him
my sons been walking, like a toddle, for a week or so.
i have been sitting in a static haze of my own betraying thoughts,
i make a victim of myself lamenting decisions i have made
mourning my past - oh hindsight and duality.
Past shadows of ghosts, and whispers tugging.
my head and my heart argue. clutched like in the midlife.
i think i missed my twenties, but i am not mad
Many of my friends, older and gray. my teachers -
Mentors like i thought they would be back then
But not tomorrow.
Only to say that i regret decision but not decisions.
That hindsight doesn't bleed into foresight.
We choose regret. we opt for joy.
To grapple at love.
What of our selections - our borders - exclusivity.
Mapping out love, it's borderlands and territories.
Like kings and oxen reveering the fence line -
But as buzzards and gazelle to dance with disregard.
my friend, he died - i miss him - gazelle
Wiser fool than we are now. to encompass and understand.
i should tell her - probably not -
Wisdom is the ant.
Hindsight then is foresight now.
Did i mention my friend - he's walking.

Be still. . .

One of the hardest things to come to terms with in life is the simplicity of Jesus teaching. There is something about the way that we think or some inner desire that causes us to snowball toward organization. Perhaps we get bored far too easily especially in this day and age of ADHD. Perhaps the speed of life causes us to need more structure, or our being created in the Creators image drives in us the need to be constantly creating. Some creativity is good, it is pleasing to the senses. Some creativity is pleasing to God. It brings praise. The melody of human voice through fields of poetry, or carried in the winds of song. The manipulations of color and shapes, the building of landscapes adorned with flowers, and their scents and colors. Other building is not pleasing. It erodes the ties that bind us together in love and brotherhood causes the hungry to weaken, the thirsty to grow more parched, and the weak to loose what remains of their waning strength. And yet it seems a part of our DNA, and we can't shake it, and we accept it, and it weighs on us. Our first calling was never to interpret the mysteries of creation or the end of the world, to translate prophesy. As Eberhard Arnold noted toward the middle of the last century; Jesus never called us to interpret his commands, he called us to do them. To love our neighbors AS OURSELVES, to give to the poor, to encourage one another. We were never commanded to figure out God, we were made to love him, and no man large or small has been given the right to tell us how to love God. We are all unique, and God has made us so for a reason. He has called us to worship him in spirit and in truth. That worship can never be attained through repetition of another mans technique or system. In spirit and in truth we are called to worship and praise God from our own longings, with our own words, and our own crying out. From the passions that drive us we are to devote ourselves to praise of God, which is nothing more than accepting that we have made nothing, and that all of life and its accoutrements are gifts to us. And worship is no more than a matter of obedience, an idea not well received by many of us, especially Americans. The saddest truth is that we are to be obedient to two of the simplest, most no nonsense rules; Love God, and love your neighbor as you love yourself. This is hard because it means the total removal of selfishness, and that everyone is equal. No man or woman is any greater than any other, regardless of race, or stature. To love is simple, to love is hard. We have to shed all pride, and selfishness, and stretch ourselves out in honesty and candor. To live in obedience to Jesus is not to meet on Sundays, sing songs and say prayers, but to meet together daily, to encourage one another, provide for the needs of one another and seek the kind of love that Jesus lived.

Love eliminates selfish ambitions.

i spent some time in the town offices today. While conducting my business i wandered over to the tax maps and started exploring some of the properties around my house. my wife and i have wanted to add a little bit more to our house lot, and there is plenty of open land around us.
During the course of my exploration an employee of the town pointed out that my neighbor was a number of years behind in his property taxes. In fact next year the town will be tax acquiring his property and auctioning it off.
He is a quiet man. i have never talked more than the equivalent of two or three paragraphs to the man, but i have seen him around the neighborhood, helping out neighbors.
At first my thought was wow. . . i am sure that i can move in and buy some land cheaply off of him and settle his account with the town.
In retrospect, as i drove home pleased with my new discovery it hit. . . in that ha-ha the new cliche told you so sorta way. What would Jesus do?
Do nothing out of selfish ambition. Do good in secrecy don't do it for the approval of man. They sold to provide for others. I needed shelter and you gave me a place to stay. . . can the list go on?
Jesus would pay the man's debt (actually he did - different debt though). What is love? Have i gone without? Am i without? Is my house in the greatest of shape? NO! Are there things i need? Maybe? Are there things i would like to have and do? Yes.
What would love do?