How have we missed the mark?

What a swirling cluster of thoughts that are floating around in my head tonight. There is nothing worse than having so many thoughts at once that you can't stop to focus on just one. Mental ADHD i suppose.
It's a hard thing to come to a point in your life when you know that the way set out before you, the best way, is right there but it seems near impossible to take the first step. For years i have struggled with anger, and possession, and me. A "me" centered universe. America, and capitalism for the "good" that they bring may be the worst things that ever happened to the church. Both find culmination in the pleasing of self - with careful study one finds that this is contrary to the teachings of Jesus.
i just finished watching a video on the life of Keith Green and followed that up with a read through the sixty first chapter of Isaiah. All that is left to say is, "What a sad lot we have become."
i see a gospel full of Love, and putting others first. Then i see a church (insert whatever denomination or lack there of that you choose) that helps the needy. . . so long as it doesn't threaten "my" security, good name, or retirement account.
How shallow have i become. i have a good friend named Tom. He operates a non-profit organization with his wife. They have lived without personal income, or even jobs for somewhere near a decade now. They have relied wholly on the Lord and he has provided. Jesus said something about the birds and the flowers and we are more special than they. We say it. . . do we believe it?
For some time i have made excuses. My wife isn't quite up to speed with me. We aren't on the same page. We can't make any big moves until we get the bills paid off. . . .CRAP ALL OF IT!
Feed the hungry, give water to the thirsty, visit the sick, visit the imprisoned, tend to widows and orphans in their affliction, clothe the naked, house the homeless. How much easier can it get??

Somewhere destiny and tomorrow.

What a quandary,

i sit here on the precipice of good and the best. Problem is i don't know which is which. There is an amazing opportunity to throw in with some friends of mine that are part of a non-profit group to help troubled boys. They are and have commit themselves to wholly follow God and are selling all of their belongings and donating the proceeds to the program. The hope is to buy a suitable sized parcel of land and put a couple of buildings on it and run a farm/camp program to help rehabilitate the boys. In this they would be living totally communally.
Oh how i desire that. . . but something is amiss. Not that they are doing anything shady, but somehow i know in my heart that it is not where my wife would be happy, and even i have reservations. Grrrrr. . . i know what i long for, but i know not how to get there.
i want for a vow of poverty, i want to serve the poor, i want to be a self-sufficient in this life as i can be (so as to follow Paul's example and not be a burden to anyone - including the state), i want to live in perfect community so much as it is attainable in this life.
Father, grant me patience! The time is coming.

Consistency and the legal system

Over the years God has been blamed for a lot. Everything from the inquisition to the war in Iraq has in some way or another been God's fault. i imagine that this is partly due to the fact that over the years a lot of people have been claiming to things in God's name.
Since when did people, especially Americans take anyone at face value. With rare exception i have observed that we tend to be people that don't believe in much of anything unless we have experienced it in one way or another (touch, taste, smell, see, lived through, etc). So how is it that we are willing to believe every person that claims that God told them to act in one way or another, especially when it is an act that is contradictory to love? There will always be things that will happen that we will not understand. Some times things happen that seem to be horrible from our perspective but in the larger scope of things work out for the greater good. My father died, and i was devastated, but through his death my family was able to move into a better housing situation get out of debt and help out a number of people in the process. My father now rests with God. But that is a side thought!
Consider the legal system. In America you are innocent until proven guilty (in theory anyway). Taxpayers spend millions upon millions of dollars every year on trials and re-trials, and appeals and more appeals, just to prove a person guilty - even when there are multiple credible eye witness'. Yet if someone tacks God's name to some atrocious act he is instantly guilty.
Here lies another deficiency - we often formulate opinions on matters and there are countless "instant experts" most of whom have never examined all of the facts. In America, and i imagine elsewhere, we are so fond of trusting the mass media. It can't be done. Not only because most media outlets have underlying agendas but because often even they haven't all of the facts.
And so it is with God. i wonder of those who are so quick to blame God for all of the problems of the world, how many of them have really examined the facts of God??
This is my charge to myself and anyone who reads this. . . Regardless of what we think we now about ANY issue, lets take a minute, if it is a really worthwhile issue, to really examine all of the facts. If it is not worthwhile or not an issue that we should concern ourselves with (global gossipism) then lets stick to making the place we live in a better place!

The gift of compartmentalization (is that a real word?)

So there are seven deadly sins, and at least one deadly spiritual gift - the gift of compartmentalization (i say this jest). i am a small fragment in a larger community known to us as the Saturday Night Group - because we meet on Saturday nights and we really don't have a name. This week i was meeting with another gent who is part of our small community, he often leads the group in discussion and is a very gifted moderator! During the course of our conversation he said something that before that moment i probably would not have thought much of. But in that moment i was taken aback and suddenly wondered where such an evil phrase could have come from. He said something like, "I am not in a good headspace and shouldn't do the lesson this week."What the heck is that?!?!It occurred to me that some of us have been so trained that we must approach God only when we are in such a such a head space or having done only good for seven hours before and so on yadda, yadda, yadda, that we feel that if we don't me the proper level of "holiness" that we have nothing to contribute. What a bunch of bull! As if we can build a fence high enough to keep God out some aspects of our lives. God sees us in our sleeping, and our waking. In our victories and our sinning. There is no time that we should try and distance ourselves from God, especially when we are struggling. Look at the psalms! What a better example of man approaching God when he is struggling. Struggle and failure are apart of our growing (albeit a lousy part), but rather than hide that from God and our "family" we should lay it out on the table, so that we can grow. To my friend i say, "Don't cringe or back away." If it is your turn to moderate the discussion then do it. In coming in humility you may be helped, and the community will have a deeper lesson in all of it - How to approach God in our struggling. God wants to be with us at all times. . . to help us grow. Trying to hide are struggles, pains and failures from God is like going to work in a cellophane suit. . .Ultimately it is rather embarrassing!!
Remember, God is ALWAYS with us. He doesn't leave us, we simply have a hard time sensing his presence. We don't have to ask him to join us, he is there. Instead we should ask, Father make me aware of you, give me a heart that hears you!

Religionship. . .

Again and again i can hear it in my head. The anthem that was repeatedly ground in as a young man. . . "Christianity is about relationship not religion". We aim to reinforce with programs and better services, and support groups, and revivals, and so on. Will we ever learn. Even in our endeavors to form house churches, we build upon programs - maybe not of the caliber we see in other churches, but still we make set ritualistic meetings and the like.
i saw a sign outside a meeting hall the other day that read 'Revival', and i wonder, are they announcing this joyfully because a revival has come or are they trying to force a revival.
my friend Kristin has been in the country of Wales as a missionary for a time now. When she came back on hiatus she told the story of a great revival that took place around the turn of the century in the area near Pontypridd. To this day much of what took place there is gone, but the memory remains, of the amazing things that took place, of the amazing things that were a result of it.
We as people taste something so beautiful and then long after that thing so badly that we, out of desperation, try to force it over again. i am guilty too.
Well i hope that this is a part of the legacy of the Pontypridd revival. . . that as i carry that story with me that i will seek better things but not force them. Like the old Chinese proverb (at least i think it was Chinese) When the people are ready the master will come.
i would rather that one real, truly amazing event take place in my life than a million forced events that never touch the grandeur of the one.
To answer my Mormon friends - No, i don't believe that Jesus came to set up his church. i believe that he came to set up his kingdom. He cares more for love than for structure. God's true followers worship in spirit and in truth. . .

Think about this

It is possible to over-analyze a thought to the point of detriment to the original thought.